While I appreciate the nominators' desire to preserve the exact words of the notebook, I'm afraid most people will be confused by the construction of the sentence and the use of quotation marks and parentheses. Until I read the notes - which won't be available to people reading the plaque - I was totally mystified.
Another concern in the same sentence is saying that the resistance "was" something "as" the temperature was lowered. The "was" implies an action completed while the "as" suggests a process in progress. I realize this is probably a nit but I think it would be better to say the resistance approached zero or became practically zero as the temperature was reduced or that the the resistance was practically zero after the temperature had been reduced.
I agree that the initial version of the citation for the Milestone plaque had a number of deficiencies. I have conferred with a number of colleagues and also a non-technical person, who teaches English at the high school level,who have proposed a number of changes and correction to the citation which I hope will made it more suitable for use on the Milestone plaque.
The nomination is quite comprehensive and adequately meets the requirements of plague location, benefits and social impacts. The use of the temperature unit "kelvin" seemed obvious to me, and and old physics handbook, but after looking more closely at the discussion thread, the term "kelvins" did only appear once in my google searchs, and that is what the current citation shows. A second set of eyes would be useful to ensure the correct use of "kelvin".